As I have said before, I grew up in the pizza-loving town of Bayonne, NJ where there was either a pizza joint or pizza-making bar on every corner. Take-out pizza was also a family affair at home. I remember how Mom would send me down to the bar on the corner to pick up a pie to bring home at a time when a whole small pie was only $1.00 and the whole large was just $1.25. I even recall one day when they gave me a cold one for free when somebody called-in an order and never picked it up. (Prank pizza calls were big back in the day.) If the waitress only knew how good a reheated pizza is she would have charged me more! Sorry, I digress.
Also when I was young, it seemed that Mom and Dad didn’t have a lot of stories to tell. So the ones that they did tell they tended to repeat often; very often. One that I remember them telling was how on their honeymoon in Florida, they couldn’t believe that they actually saw people eating pizza with a knife and fork! I must admit that even back then, long before I was the Snob, I thought that was pretty funny.
Fellow pizza-fans, slices were meant to fold and eat; unless of course you truly need the knife and fork because you are eating some overstuffed abomination that your good taste should not have you eating in the first place! My friend DJ Dave recently replied to one of my blog posts saying he didn’t like eating food that he had to fold. That got me thinking, and other than a flour tortilla, I really couldn’t come up with anything else that you fold to eat. So I guess Dave just isn’t partial to NY slices and soft tacos. Here’sa shot of the Kid getting ready to scarf one down in the classic “Fold” style, leaving his fork on the table.
Other than the Fold, there really ain’t much else to eating your slice. And on analysis, it seems that the Fold kind of holds things in (cheese and sauce) keeping it un-messy. Thinking more about it, it will also to some extent, protect the upper roof of your mouth if your slice was a little too hot to be eating in the first place. The Fold will also help you accommodate draining off any excess oil should that be the case with your slice.
But I would like to close out this piece by showing you a classic eating move that I have developed over the years. I call it the “Rip.” So, you are eating a slice down from the top the way one obviously should. But due to its triangle shape, it is of course thinner at the top than at the bottom, and as a result, at some point, you will find yourself in this spot, as illustrated by fellow pizza-lover, baseball fan and 10-K runner, Mr. Mark.
It’s a tough spot to be in since what is left of the slice is wider than your mouth. You could eat it from the side but that just doesn’t seem right as you certainly want to enjoy the remaining taste of sauce and cheese without the end crust getting in the way. So that’s when you employ the Rip as further illustrated by Mr. Mark below.
Voila! Now you can easily finish off your slice from top to bottom on each of the remaining parts of your slice. So, from years of experience, that is the Snob’s take on eating a slice. Happy folding and ripping to you all!